As best as I can recall, I’ve owned 8 different cell
phones. Not all of them died
horrible, unnecessary deaths, but most of them did. Let me give you a brief summary to bring you up to date on some of the worst incidents:
Incident #1 – C sees a group of campers, cautiously
dipping their toes in the pool. In
a burst of inspired goofiness, he takes off at a sprint in the direction of the
pool, hoping to show these feeble campers that they had nothing to fear. Without breaking stride he hurdles the
fence surrounding the pool and in two more steps launches himself over the
watery surface of the deep end.
Suddenly the realization grips him that this was a terrible idea, and not just because of
the 15 camp rules to which he just laid waste. He claws at the air and instinctively tries to dodge the
frigid waters that now have him in their grasp. Finally as his toes hit the water he helplessly scrapes at
his back pocket in an effort to retrieve his cell phone and throw it to
safety. Its too late. All is lost. There is only the smell of chlorine, the penetrating cold of
the water, and the long walk home wearing wet jeans.
