Winter Sports: A Musical Review

There’s just something about winter sports… 

something so… 

so attractive about the idea of passing them up altogether in favor of a good book, a hot drink and a chair by the wood stove.  The winter here is at least 5 months long though, and my butt can’t take quite that much gelatinous inactivity, so I’ve developed a short list of favorites.  The truth is, while I almost always hesitate to go through the effort of suiting up and hitting the tundra, I can’t remember once that I regretted it when returning home. 

In honor of the colder pastimes, I’ve assembled a companion to my earlier list of sports, again accompanied by musical artists to help me communicate the nature of my relationship with each activity.

Alpine Skiing – Coldplay in Concert

Like my days as an alpine skier, Coldplay peaked back when Lance Armstrong was still a hero.  Like seeing Coldplay in concert, alpine skiing is prohibitively expensive to the point of nearly being unavailable altogether.  Like the simple, sustained and repetitious tones of Coldplay’s work, skiing has a beautifully natural, almost rythmic, aspect in its undulations.  You can’t help but swing your hips a little.  Like followers of Coldplay, my interest in skiing is pretty mainstream.  I almost always maintain contact with the ground, only seldom dip into real powder (lets face it I live in the Northeast), and approach trees or bumps with the grace of heifer on ice.

XC Skiing – Foy Vance

I wish I could say that I was a skate skier, flying down manicured pathways at 15 miles per hour, but manicuring isn’t something that’s applied to the woods where I live.  Come to think of it it’s not a term that's applied to almost anything around here (blogger sniffs his armpit then returns to his keyboard).  My XC experiences are more plodding ventures.  I emerge from my basement, unashamed of my pace or my wobbly countenance as I pick my way through the snow immersed in a world of frozen beauty (sometimes literally).  Foy Vance is an Irish singer-songwriter with an uplifting style that won’t impress your hipster friends, but plays well on your heartstrings.  Its mostly slow and simple, which matches my pace and experience level on XC skis, but also brings to mind the sonic elements of life outside in the winter.  If you stand still, and listen hard, at first you hear nothing – the snow insulates most sounds into nothingness – but as your ears adjust to the silence, you can begin to hear the snowflakes fall.  This is not some poetic imagery.  You can actually hear them hit the ground.  If you haven’t tried this, put down your iPad and go listen to the snow.  No seriously leave right now.

Snowshoeing – Gregory Alan Isakov

Snowshoeing is like XC skiing, but EVEN SLOWER.  Gregory Allen Isakov could look Sarah Mclachlin in the eye and tell her to settle down.  He’s worth the time.  So’s snowshoeing…  like…  if you have no other options.

Snowmobiling – Elton John

You have to admit though, its gorgeous out there.

Snowmobiling is my great act of hypocrisy.  Before the smell of 2-stroke oil gives me up I might as well admit it.  Riding my SkiDoo is my guilty pleasure.  In the warmth of summer, from the high-horse of my bike saddle, its so easy to poke fun at the overweight 4-Wheel riders who tear up the trails.  Only months later though, here I am, and the greatest effort of my day is nothing more than ripping on the pull-start of my noise machine.  What can I say?  It’s fun, and the winter is long.  No one says they love Elton John when someone asks them about music.  We all wrack our brains in that instant to think of the most indie band we can for fear of sounding “mainstream.”  Lets be honest though.  We all love us some “Tiny Dancer” when no one’s looking. 

Summer Sports – Eminem 

Eminem recalls a different time in my life.  It's a time that's gone, and not one that I really want back any time soon.  The experience of firing up the old subwoofer and listening to Eminem until it makes me blush reminds me of my many attempts to force summer sports into all four seasons.  I regret it almost as soon as I’ve started.  Have you ever gone mountain biking in the dark on 3 inches of fresh snow?  I have.  It was just as fun as it sounds.  Have you ever pushed a kayak across ½ a mile of thin, crackling ice?  I have.  It’s like walking, only colder, and with the threat of a frosty death.  Even running is harder in winter.  The pain from cold air in your esophagus, the Yaktrax digging into the bottoms of your feet…  Winter’s not for wimps. 

All the same, winter is about contrast, and contrast is the palate with which life brushes in our otherwise canvas selves.  Winter makes spring spectacular.  The wood stove pulls us close because cold feet want warming.  Elton John is fun because normal is boring.   As you choose your own pastimes, may winter be the frost on your pumpkin, and the wasabi on your tuna.